Next time, I'll order the steak

I had a bit of a wait this evening while in line at Chipotle Mexican restaurant, and while I was there, I saw a sign they had plastered above our heads that mentioned their ethical treatment of the chickens they serve in their burritos and tacos. Now, mind you, I don't normally eat at this establishment, mostly because it is sometheres near $6.00 for a burrito and extra for tortilla chips and a drink. After it is all said and done, you end up spending close to $10 for a burrito dinner that is close to 90% rice. Rice, I implore you! I can go to the grocery store and buy enough rice to feed Ulaanbaatar for a decade. I mean, seriously, rice is the least expensive thing in there next to air. All of this got me to thinking: Why are these damn burritos so costly? What is in them to warrant such a hefty price tag? Then, like a beacon of light from the sky, I saw the aforementioned sign.

It smugly said something along the lines of, "All of our meat is kept in open areas, fed grain, and not injected with hormones."

"That is it!" I thought to myself. Actually, I mumbled it outloud, causing some of the people in line behind me to give me the once over. "That is why it takes the equivalent of the GNP of a third-world country to feed me."

I almost considered asking for "non-free-range chicken"* just out of spite, simply because I was apalled at the prices they are gouging the public with. I'm sure the goth teen would sardonically smile at me through her array of lip rings, then vow to spend the rest of her life making people like me uncomfortable; that, or spit on my ethically-treated yet boring-as-hell chicken.

Which is exactly what it is - BORING! No one in life likes hearing stories about lily-white, cornfed, nice, well-treated, pampered people, and we shouldn't ask that that of our game as well. The way I see it, "free range" equates to bland and tasteless. When I see a chicken with no hormones injected, I see a chicken with no character or personality. We get tougher whenever we live through crisis and strife, and I see no point in not allowing the same for fowl.

As I gave her my free burrito coupon (yes, I wasn't even going to pay anyway, but it is not the point), and saw the hatred gurgling over, I decided to hold off on asking....maybe next time.


*No chickens, or anthing else for that matter, were hurt during the writing of this post or the creation of my awful photoshopped chicken coop. Some chicken got ate during my dinner, but not a whole lot.